The other day I talked with my Son and he let me know some
details around his stay when he comes to visit in Athabasca for Christmas. What
I had planned in my little head around “Christmas will be awesome if”…and what
Jason has planned in his head around “Christmas will be awesome if”…are two
totally different scenarios. When I
heard his details I chose to be crushed and I felt like someone punched me in
the stomach (which when I think around it now…how heavy was my choice to be
crushed and all the crazy thoughts that went with that). So many stories came
rushing to the surface and so many conclusions became really loud around how
NOT FUN my Christmas was going to be.
This led me to ask questions around what I was choosing in that moment
around the plans Jason has for himself to make his Christmas special and fun
for him. Where was I in the equation of
making my Christmas special and fun for me? How many decisions, judgements,
conclusions, computations, projections, separations, expectations, and
rejections did I have around Jason making my Christmas special and fun for me? How
crazy is that? Where am I making my Christmas special and fun for me?
Jason always shows me what choosing for you truly looks like and for that I am grateful; after I clear all the crap I pile on top of it. It makes me happy to know he knows how to create his life based on what he would like and not based on anyone else! I wonder what else is NOW possible?
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